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Stephen Bonesteele 
"Crowned One"
Born into this world: June 19, 1987
Received the crown of eternal life: December 15, 2003
"Be a life long or short,
it's completeness depends on
what it was lived for."
-David Starr Jordan
Journal
Wednesday, April 6, 2005 9:35 PM CDT On June 19th, 1987, God blessed our family with a beautiful baby boy, Stephen Scott Bonesteele. Not a day goes by that we don’t thank our God for making our lives richer for having known and loved Stephen. You may think that Stephen only lived sixteen short years. You may even think that it isn’t fair he died so young. But I am convinced that Stephen lived out God’s purposes for his life in the time that he was given. And he lived them with outrageous joy and passion.
Stephen may have had cancer in his life. But cancer never defined the life of Stephen. He had an incredible will to choose hope over despair. No spinal taps, no bone marrow tests and no amount of chemo treatments could triumph over Stephen’s courageous spirit.
Stephen displayed resoluteness when it came to his education, always striving to complete homework and missed assignments. Where others may have given up, Stephen set his mind to succeed. This steadfastness continued on throughout his educational career, proving to be a source of encouragement to his teachers and classmates. In his final year of high school he was presented with an award for perseverance.
Stephen’s determination was also evident in his personal life. He loved people and placed high priority on relationships. Stephen seized every opportunity to spend time with family and friends. He possessed natural leadership qualities, a positive attitude and a sense of humor that made him a desirable friend. He did his utmost to live life every day it was offered to him. During his years of treatment for Leukemia, he played baseball, soccer and basketball through community sports programs. He rode his bike, loved to skateboard and was hooked on snowboarding the first time he tried it. He was always ready and willing to try anything, especially if it involved a bit of risk. He was, at times, fearless. He once hung onto the back of a car while on his skateboard, resulting in the fracture of his knee. As parents, we were both horrified and thankful…horrified at the injury yet thankful that the disease had not snuffed out our son’s zeal for adventure.
Stephen’s steadfast character also marked his spiritual life. He became a lover of Jesus Christ at a young age and strove to know, love and serve Him from his preschool days forward. Through all of Stephen’s illness, he never questioned God’s love and care for him. As a mother who lived at his bedside for 7 months during some of the most darkest of days, we shared many precious heart-to-heart talks. Stephen loved his Lord and never blamed Him for his troubles. Stephen believed that there was more to this life than what he could see, touch, taste, or experience. He believed that God was caring for Him whether he was healthy or sick. He maintained his faith that God’s plans for him extended on into eternity.
"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
Stephen was in no way perfect. The flip side of his strong character was that he was, at times, undesirably stubborn. He struggled with materialism and had difficulty resisting the temptation to be selfish. But he never allowed his faults to damage his relationships. He was obedient to his parents and to his Lord. He practiced forgiveness and restoration in his relationships. He trusted in God to help him overcome his weaknesses.
Stephen’s life was such a precious gift. He taught us so much while he was entrusted to our care. His legacy speaks to me in loud whispers…make today count. Yesterday’s gone and you have no guarantee of tomorrow. Place high value on relationships. Be vulnerable in your relationships. Give yourself and your love to family and friends. Look for humor in the small things of your day. Take advantage of every opportunity. Try new things. Conquer your fears with incredible faith in Jesus Christ, who has already conquered your worst enemy: death.
Stephen lived his life with courageous faith and extreme joy. He understood that his worst enemy wasn’t cancer but a broken spirit without the Lord. Stephen’s final words before leaving us were directed toward his father…“Dad, are we in Hawaii?” What precious words and a comforting gift. God was honoring Stephen’s faith and trust in Him and ushering him from our arms into His: paradise.
Jesus promises that because He lives, Stephen also will live. We eagerly await the day that we will be reunited with our dear Stephen again. I am so thankful that God has the final say on cancer and death...He has promised us eternal joy found only in Him...
...no one can take that away...not even cancer.
By Robin Bonesteele,
whose honor and joy it is
to be the mother of Stephen.
Read Journal History
Links: http://www.4kidswithcancer.org Our local Candlelighters
http://www.bereavedparentsusa.org Online newsletters contain stories, poems and articles relating to loss of a child
http://www.griefshare.org 365 daily e-devotions to help you through your first year of grief
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