CaringBridge.org - emilysfight

Welcome to Emily's website. This site was created to keep all of Emi's family and friends updated on her progress to win her courageous fight with cancer! She was officially diagnosed with Rhabdomyosarcoma on May 20th of 2004. Just weeks after her first birthday. She received all of her care through Texas Children’s Hospital and the cancer center located in Houston and the local office in McAllen. She went through 42 weeks of treatment including chemo and radiation. On June 12th she was diagnosed with a brain tumor and immediately flown by the kangaroo crew to TCH. On the 15th of June the tumor was 95% removed and she was officially diagnosed with Glioblastoma Multiform or GBM. Again she had radiation and chemo. But God had a different kind of Miracle in store for our Emi. Emily Marie Hinsley earned her angel wings on May 27th around 3:30 in the afternoon. She was surrounded by her whole family who loved her dearly and will miss her so much! But right now she is chasing butterflys with Grandpa finally cancer Free.
Emily Marie Hinsley
May 8, 2003 to May 27, 2008

The Chosen Mothers
by Erma eck

Most women become a mother by ,
some by choice and a few by habit. Did you ever wonder
how mother's of children with life
threatening illnesses are chosen?

Somehow, I visualize God hovering over earth selecting His instruments for progagation with great care and
deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels
to make notes in a giant ledger.......

"Armstrong, Beth, son, patron saint Matthew"
Forrest, Marjorie, daughter, patron saint Cecilia"
Rutledge, Carrie, twins, partron saint Greard."

Finally, He passes a name to an angel and says, "Give
her a child with cancer." The angel is curious. "Why this
one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a child with cancer
a mother who does not know laughter?
That would be cruel."

"But, does she have patience?" asks the angel,

"I don't want her to have too much patience
or she will drown
in a sea of self-pity and despair.
Once the shock and resentment
wears off, she will handle it."

"I watched her today," said God.
"She has that feeling of self-independence
that is so rare and necessary in a mother.
You see, the child I'm going to
give her has it's own world.
She has to make it live in her world
and that's not going to be easy."

"But Lord, I don't think she believes in you,"
said the angel."No matter, I can fix that.
This one is perfect.
She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child
occasionally, she'll never survive.
Yes, here is the woman
I will bless with a child less
than perfect.
She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied.
She will never take anything her child does for granted. She will never consider a single step ordinary. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see....ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....
and allow her to rise above them."

"And what about her patron saint" asks the angel,
his pen poised in mid-air.

God smiles and says..."A mirror will suffice."

Prayer for a Sick Child
Lord, I come to you with a heavy heart. My child is ill, and I feel so powerless. I have such mixed emotions. I feel grateful that my child is alive and that our modern medicine and technology are available to help. At the same time, I am filled with fear that this precious gift might not be healthy. I wonder if there is anything I could have done to avoid this tragedy. I am angry that my child should suffer while still and helpless. I hear my child cry and am unable to bring relief and comfort. Help me be strong during this crisis, Lord.

Sometimes my anger is turned toward my husband and family. Please do not let us grow apart because of my child’s illness. Help me communicate my feelings, and to reach out for comfort from those I love. Let me be aware of the fear and frustration of my husband, family, and friends, and to share their grief. Open me to the compassion and care of the other families whose children are in intensive care.

Jesus/Lord, the Scriptures are filled with accounts of parents who came to you when their children were sick. You responded by bringing healing and new life. I come to you now, asking that my child might live and be healthy. Hear my prayer for this child whom you love. Bring him/her health. I believe that you have the power to cure my child; strengthen my unbelief. Give the doctors and nurses the wisdom to know what to do, and the skills to help my child. I trust you, Lord, and than you ahead of time for what you will do for my child.

ANGEL JEAN
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WHEN YOU WISH UPON A STAR
COURTESY
OF
ALL MIDIS

My Letter To Emily Read during her funeral:
My Dear Emi
I have written this letter in my mind a millions times. Never actually wanting to write but knowing that one day God would finally take you to a place of peace, happiness and fun free from cancer. A place where you can run, laugh and play while always looking down on me, your daddy and brothers. Right now as I write you this one last letter you’re sleeping very soundly but not really here with us anymore. On occasion we get a mumble of something like fighting with your brothers, telling me it’s your turn, say hi to Mickey Mouse or wanting your babba. You’ve taken me through many fun times in your short little life as I sit next to you.
Thank you Emily for coming to us and letting me be your mommy now and forever. Thank you for teaching me how to love unconditionally, to be patient, caring, a stronger mommy and wife, to live each day and never look back at what if’s, to laugh, smile, to gain “girl power”, a faith in God and his plan and for completing our family. From the day you were born I always knew you were special but I never truly realized how special you would become to so many people.
Emi when I think of you I will always remember your curly hair, your big blue eyes, your long eyelashes, your petite little body, your love for your brothers and your special and unique bond to both daddy and I. You had an amazing smile, laugh, vocabulary, understanding of everything around you and what was happening to you during this journey on earth, a giving heart and a contagious charisma. You are and will always be loved by so many people. I’m humbled as a mommy by all the people who care about you and checked on you all the time. I know that God chose me to be your mommy and I’m thankful for his miracle for loving you for only 5 short years yet 5 glorious years all the same. You have taught me so much and given me so much love that my heart is so full of you and will always be. I look at all the pictures hanging on the walls of your beautiful face each one capturing your personality. Emily you are incredible and magnificent. Your bald beautiful head from your first cancer treatment, to those curly, curly hairs that came back to now and those cute full cheeks. I am such a better person for loving you and knowing you, remember we are two peas in a pod and we completed each other.
I will miss you so much, who will tell me how pretty I look when my hair is all over the place and when I look like I just woke up, who will tell me how crazy my hair looks, who will tell me when I don’t have my make up on are you giving your face a rest mommy, who will tell me how good I smell, who will complete my thought before I even do, who will be my side kick and go to target, Wal-Mart, the mall and all the trips to take your brothers places during the day, who will drink coffee frapicinos with me, who will go with me to the pretty store Renee’s and look around and have lunch, who will help me make daddy a sandwich at lunch time eating the lunch meat as we make it and licking the knife from the mayo, who will sing my only sunshine off key, who will rhyme everything with me, who will tell me I love your hugs mommy and that tickles when I kiss you, who will tell Ronnie and Justin to stop fighting, who will yell at Bailey and tell her how much she stinks, who will get mad when your door opens to your room wondering who is trying to sleep in it this time, who will go with me to get my toes done and help me pick out a shade of pink and who will go to all the eagle football games with me actually watching the game and cheering for number one your big brother Tre and all the other players.
Life will never be the same without you Emi. You are my warrior, my princess, my fighter, my peanut, my mama, my dude oh I mean dudette as you would always correct me, my beautiful girl, my love bug, my em, my emi and most importantly my Emily Marie. The world is better place having had you in it. Because of you Emi I hug more, I love more, and I live more. Because of you so many people have learned to cherish their own children more, hug them more often and enjoy their own families. You were a Brave Little Soul…….
'The Brave Little Soul'

Not too long ago in Heaven there was a little soul who took wonder in observing the world. She especially enjoyed the love she saw there and often expressed this joy with God. One day however the little soul was sad, for on this day she saw suffering in the world. She approached God and sadly asked, 'Why do bad things happen; why is there suffering in the world?'

God paused for a moment and replied, 'Little Soul, do not be sad, for the suffering you see, unlocks the love in people's hearts.' The little soul was confused. 'What do you mean,' she asked. 'God replied, 'Have you not noticed the goodness and love that is the offspring of that suffering? Look at how people come together, drop their differences and show their love and compassion for those who suffer. All their other motivations disappear and they become motivated by love alone.'

The little soul began to understand and listened attentively as God continued, 'The suffering soul unlocks the love in people's hearts much like the sun and the rain unlock the flower within the seed. I created everyone with endless love in their heart, but unfortunately most people keep it locked up and hardly share it with anyone. They are afraid to let their love shine freely, because they are afraid of being hurt. But a suffering soul unlocks that love. I tell you this - it is the greatest miracle of all. Many souls have bravely chosen to go into the world and suffer - to unlock this love - to create this miracle - for the good of all humanity.'

Just then the little soul got a wonderful idea and could hardly contain herself. With her wings fluttering, bouncing up and down, the little soul excitedly replied, 'I am brave; let me go!! I would love to go into the world and suffer so that I can unlock the goodness and love in people's hearts! I want to create that miracle!!'

God smiled and said, 'You are a brave soul I know, and thus I will grant your request. But even though you are very brave you will not be able to do this alone. I have known since the beginning of time that you would ask for this and so I have carefully selected many souls to care for you on your journey. Those souls will help create your miracle; however they will also share in your suffering. Two of these souls are most special and will care for you, help you and suffer along with you, far beyond the others. They have already chosen a name for you.'

God and the brave little soul shared a smile, and then embraced. In parting, God said, 'Do not forget little soul that I will be with you always. Although you have agreed to bear the pain, you will do so through my strength. And if the time should come when you feel that you have suffered enough, just say the word, think the thought, and you will be healed.'

Thus at that moment the brave little soul was born into the world, and through her suffering and God's strength, she unlocked the goodness and love in people's hearts. For so many people dropped their differences and came together to show their love. Priorities became properly aligned. People gave from their hearts. Those that were always too busy found time. Many began new spiritual journeys - some regained lost faith - many came back to God. Parents hugged their children tighter. Friends and family grew closer. Old friends got together and new friendships were made. Distant family reunited, and every family spent more time together. People checked a website and sent notes of encouragement. People made and brought meals to the family of the suffering. Everyone prayed. Peace and love reigned. Lives changed forever. It was good. The world was a better place. The miracle had happened.

God was pleased ......

Goodbye for now my sweet girl please come and get me when I’m ready. I’ll help you catch the butterflies and togher we will be whole again.
Run Emi, jump Emi, Fly Emi you are FREE…I love you Emi
I love you,
mommy

On behalf of the entire Hinsley family we would like to thank all of our amazing friends for their love and support throughout this journey. They all know who they are and how special they are to us and how much we love them and will continue to need them as we try to heal and find our next normal. We would also like to thank our family whom without we would have not gotten through this last year. Both our moms gave up their own lives to help us and without them both, this year would have been even harder. We love you both very much. To all the doctors and nurses who treated Emily and guided us with their expertise throughout this journey thank you all for your support and compassion. I commend you all for sacrificing so much for the children of cancer. I don’t know how you all do your jobs, To the staff and student body and most especially the athletes of the Mission High Eagles past and present thank you for your incredible support and love for Emily. She was an angel sent to us all to teach many lessons in life and I know from all the guestbook entries she touched so many of you. She was your number one fan and loved to go to all the mission eagle games especially the football games. She would tell us all the time how much she missed football season. In fact the football players were about the only athletes she would give high fives to with of course Tre leading the pack! She loved you all so much as do all of us. And finally the amazing community of Mission. Words cannot express our gratitude for your love and support. We feel like we all were born here the way you all have helped us get through what no family should have to endure and adopted Emily like she was everyone’s daughter.

Journal

Monday, July 14, 2008 7:50 PM CDT

ALOHA from Hawaii!!! It's so beautiful here it takes my breadth away. Emily would have loved to be here in person. But her spirit is with us I feel her and heard her tiny little voice yesterday. The pineapple is to die for and our resort is amazing. 5 Stars easy! The boys are having a blast and we've spent our first day at the pool and at the beach. Justin has made instant friends as he always does and Ronnie is just like me complaining of sand in every part of his body. Tomorrow we head off for an all day boat trip! And tonight a fancy dinner in Lahiana. It's amazing here.

Justin did excellent in swimming...1st place region champ 25 breast, 2nd place 25 fly and 2nd place 25 free. He will swim in all three events in a week in San Antonio for State. He swam his heart out and improved most of his times by at least 3 seconds. Its his natural talent!

Well I better run....the sun is calling.

Angel Emi's VERY PROUD Mommy!
Michelle

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Hospital Information:

HEAVEN
Chasing Butterflys

Links:

http://www.curesearch.org   GREEN REACH THE DAY BRACELETS!!!
http://www.cancerwarriors.org   Emily is a Cancer Warrior!
http://makeawish.org   Emily's Disney trip!

E-mail Author: thinsley@rgv.rr.com

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