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Welcome to Troy's Web Page. It has been provided to keep people updated about our son. Troy was diagnosed on December 6, 2003 when he was 3 1/2 yrs old, with a brain tumor called a diffuse pontine glioma. It is rare and inoperable. He underwent 31 rounds of radiation treamtments at St. Jude Childrens Research Hospital which shrunk the tumor 90%. Troy took an alternative cancer therapy called Protocel, did one round of chemo (Zarnestra) and another natural remedy. He is now cancer free.
MAY 23, 2000 - NOVEMBER 2, 2004
Journal
Saturday, November 1, 2008 12:40 AM CDT Hello,
I know it has been a very long time since I have updated. Truth is, I just don't know what to do with the site anymore. Its purpose was to keep everyone up to date as to Troy's progress and then to let you know how we were all dealing. I just can't seem to bring myself to let the site go and never update again.
Tomorrow it will be 4 years since one piece of my heart stopped beating. I have read that after a while you smile at the happy times more than you cry about the death. Well, I have to say that that is not true. Of course I smile when I think of Troy's beauty and still thoughts of him play like a movie in my head. But 4 years later I am still angry that my child had to die. Let me say that again - I am still angry that my CHILD had to die. And no I don't smile MORE at the happy times, I still cry more because he is gone.
What I have read and talked with other parents about IS true ... you live a "new" normal life. Bottom line is, we can't bring him back ... I can't hold him now ... Hunter will never know his brother. We live knowing we are better people because he was with us for 4 1/2 years and life must move on.
He would be 8 years old now - not a little boy anymore. What would he look like? How would he be doing in school? Who would his friends be? Lord knows we needed him around to keep Hayley in line!!!! (funny - but true!)
This time every year is hard for me - still re-living his final weeks and days.
There is this song by Diamond Rio called "One More Day." The point of the song is "I simply wish for one more day with you." I have the CD and play it quite a bit in the car. Hayley and I were talking about the song and she said, "Yeah, but that would be even harder for you wouldn't it mommy?" She is so right ... but I can still wish.
Keep in touch.
All our love,
Nadine and John
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